Secret Pop

Feb 21, 2002

The Race to 3 A.M.

This notion of when I should be sleeping. I manage to make myself a guilty failure even in this. If I stay up. If I never manage to settle into cozy slumber. If I can't keep my mind off whatever it's on. I can hate myself for it. And that is the opposite of helpful.

I did feel ready to sleep tonight. But I was not where I should have been. Now that I am back where I belong, the sleep eludes me. A temptress. A tease. A woman of ill-repute who is to be avoided at all costs. What a useless metaphor that was.

I did a lot today. There is no reason to ignore that. I did a lot. I thought a lot. I wrote a lot. I dreamed a lot. I even laughed a lot. Maybe the problem is I've had my fill and then some. Maybe I just need to take it easy on some level. I wish I could fashion a protocol for that. How to take it easy in thirty-nine simple steps...

This is a time for cautious self-awareness.

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