"You're nobody 'til everybody in this town thinks you're a bastard."

The Japanese have mastered the weird and the wonderful when it comes to candy. I love this new Lotte Yukiringo Fuwawa candy. It's apple-flavored and described on its package as "Fluffy-light-delicious." Do I love the candy more? Or the adorable misuse of hyphens? I can't say.

I love it when folks are down with the Japanese. It's not there to make fun of it or to make a weird face. It's there to be admired and worshipped and treasured. And it's better than anything that comes from Hershey's or M&M/Mars. It's delicious and innovative and rife with grammatical errors. The Japanese confectionery is a thing of mystical wonder. I worship at its shrine. And I will pay any price -- ANY PRICE -- for a Zaggy bar.

Everything I just said goes for Japanese stationery, too. Except for the part about the Zaggy bar. That wouldn't make sense.