Secret Pop

Dec 3, 2005

Reliably Friendly and Incompetent Service

I went to the Vons down the street from me tonight, and I have to say I was treated to an unbelievably friendly reception by every employee I encountered. Everyone was helpful and welcoming and genuine. Seriously. It didn't even feel like a seasonal promotion. I am hard to impress in this respect. But second to the almost frightening level of kind attention I received at the Mandalay Bay last week, I have never felt so at home -- so...popular at a supermarket.

When I got to the checkout, I asked for a box of Duraflame logs, and the bagger went to assist me but couldn't quite figure out what I wanted. Once the cashier finally got him to understand that by "Duraflame" I meant the only Duraflame brand product they had, he was about to bring me a single log. The cashier intervened, and he finally brought me a case of the logs, as I requested. He was trying to read the UPC code to the cashier, and he rested the box on top of my loaf of bread. And then he put all of my canned goods in one bag. All of them. When he offered to help me out to my car, I demurely declined, assuming that he would likely accidentally puncture one of my tires or somehow lock me in my own trunk. I guess it all balances out, but honestly, it's a shame that crack team of grocereteers has such a dufus in their ranks. He was clearly not the token retarded employee either. Just not good for some reason.

After that, I went to Souplantation with Jeff and Martín, and then Jeff and I had art time with plenty of whiskey and sweet iPod serenade. Jeff is a super talented artist. It makes me hate myself and then hate him. Because I mostly glue things to paper and then scribble on top of it. Whereas he effortlessly makes fine art. Jerk.

I came back in to find a gut-wrenching Holocaust documentary on. I feel a mix of victorious, downtrodden, and hungry.

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