In the pink

Yoplait is running their campaign about sending in the pink lids of their yogurts to help raise money for breast cancer. The current commercial shows all sorts of different women licking those pink foil lids and then later putting them in envelopes and licking the envelopes and then licking stamps, and the slogan is, "Together we can lick breast cancer." And I think I find that literalization to be a gross-out. First of all, I would hate to be the mailroom staffers who have to open those gross envelopes stuffed full of their gross, saliva-covered quarry. It makes me think about the licking more than the cancer, and I think that defeats the purpose. And that makes me think of people's morning tongues mopping up the separated liquid and gungy film on the lid of their yogurt before they brush their teeth and go to work. Yuck.

Further, it has been a number of years since I bought a stamp that required licking. They're all stickers now. It's shameless posturing intended to produce an advertising correlation. Groan.

I will also refer you to Yoplait's online Breast Cancer Commitment page, because -- while I don't like thinking of strangers and all the offhand licking they may do throughout the day -- I also support breast cancer research with all the power in my own tongue. Don't let's get confused about that. Keep the boobies cancer-free. That's my policy. Maybe I should design a t-shirt.